NaPoWriMo 09 – day 18

Lost

One day past our second anniversary
when the mountain
tried to take you from me.

A stranger at the door,
using the name
I still thought of as your mother’s.

The colour drained out
of my clothes
until they were as white

as an avalanche.

snowy-mountainside

The stone weight of cold
punched the windows in

and swept me off the road – our life
streaming past with a
roar that I was
drowning in and
nothing anywhere for
me to cling to.

*  *  *

I waited in the wreckage
until the moon shone in my eyes
like headlights,

and I dreamed that you
were there, and safe.

Fallen stars, like shards
of glass, 
settled in your hair.

 

 
"
 

This is still very much a draft, but one I’m pleased with. It’s a poem I’ve tried to write before, but never really managed. This attempt to write it was triggered by Read Write Poem prompt #17 – “Missing Something”, so once again I am much obliged.

I’m really curious to know what other people think it’s about. So, guesses?

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4 thoughts on “NaPoWriMo 09 – day 18

  1. “I waited in the wreckage
    until the moon shone in my eyes
    like headlights,”

    A stanza which reminds us that in the dark hours of night
    things seem at their worst. And in the morning, in the light
    of day it all becomes either clearer; or more bearable whatever
    the case may be.

  2. Because of the way my browser opened this up the picture appeared after the line ‘as an avalanche.’ and so I thought that was it. It was only when I opened the screen up full to pass comment did the picture shift to the right and I saw the full piece. It works but I had already made my mind up that the shorter version was excellent and so the extra stanzas seem superfluous. I’d got the point.

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